Recovering

Salam and hello,

Many cancer survivors say that recovery period after radiotherapy and chemotherapy is the worst. This is because of the residual effects they have on the patients. I find that its really true. I feel a lot worse after both treatments than during the therapies. The burning sensation, the phlegm, fatigue, sleepless nights, no sense of taste and mouth sores can really drive you up the wall. These can really make you feel down because you just don't know whether it would go away and you start wondering whether the treatments are all worth it and if you die, would you die of cancer or the treatments?!

I am now about 3 weeks post treatments and I am glad to say that most of the problems mentioned above have gone. My voice is a lot clearer ( forgot to mention that I also lost my voice) now. Actually I was quite worried that I would not get my voice back because it happened to somebody I know who had radiotherapy around the neck area and the beam messed up his voicebox. I also sleep better now. The only thing that bugs me now is my appetite is zilch! I can't taste anything at all and I don't know whether I will be able to eat anymore. The only thing that gives me hope are the cancer survivors from the OCF (Oral Cancer Foundation) and the MCF (Mouth Cancer Foundation). Some of them who are also tongueless are able to eat and enjoy just about anything. I still can't imagine doing that just yet but sure hope that I'll qualify to join the club soon! (Insyaallah).

Last Thursday, an old friend, Zarina dropped by with another friend, Chee. We were college mates in Eastern Illinois University. The last time Zarina and I met was on her wedding day. It has been about 20 years and now her eldest son is already in college. When I saw her, I was so shocked because she has not changed one bit. She is just as cute and chirpy as I remember. We talked and reminisced about old time.

Yesterday evening, after being cooped up for days, I decided to follow my husband to the night market. There were a lot of food and the smell was wonderful. Oh...how I miss savouring laksa, fried kueh teow, pasembor, chicken rice and so on. How I wish I could just grab a chair and enjoy all those food...just like the old time. After buying a few things, we left. When we got home, I realised that my handphone was missing when I wanted to call my parents. I was so disappointed and felt so lost..huhu. But then, after a while, I thought to myself, oh heck...its just a handphone, not cancer..haha

So this morning I went to get me a new mobile and register for a new line. So, friends out there, please take note that my new number is 013-5313020 and do sms (text) me because I lost all your numbers. This line will only be operable on Monday evening.

Life is so unpredictable, isn't it?

Bye, for now.

"Life is too short, but intend to grow old gracefully"